Do you make love, do the horizontal dance, copulate or mate? There are a thousand ways to talk about sex without literally using the word ‘sex’, but they all mean slightly different things. In fact, there’s a whole vocabulary around the world of relationships in general. In order to navigate these tricky waters, here’s a bit of sex-slang, de-coded.
All the way – To have sex with someone.
Bae – means ‘before anyone else’ and is usually used in reference to your partner, lover or crush. i.e. ‘I can’t wait to catch a movie with my bae tonight.’
Bone – admittedly it might be young guys who use this more than young women, but it refers to consensual penetration in a rather crass way because another word for erection is boner. i.e. ‘I boned them last night.’
Bang – means to have hard, energetic sex, usually at full volume. i.e. ‘We banged so loudly the second we were alone!’
The bases – these tend to be more American terms for different stages of a relationship, but movies and pop culture mean we hear them a lot.
- First base – kissing
- Second base – touching, stroking, heavy-petting and other ‘underneath the clothes’ activities
- Third base – oral sex
- Home run – consensual sexual intercourse
Finger bang – To insert one or more fingers into another person’s vagina or anus for sexual pleasure.
Fool around – this doesn’t necessarily mean you’re having intercourse, but it usually involves foreplay with someone you’re really into. i.e. ‘We’re not ready to have sex yet, but we definitely both love fooling around.’
Franger – A condom
F*ck Buddy (aka friends with benefits) – someone you have regular sex with, with a mutual no-strings agreement. i.e. ‘Neither of us want a real relationship right now, but we have great sex as f*ck buddies.’
Get laid – an ambiguous way of saying you had sex, or would like to have sex. i.e. ‘I got laid last night but I’d happily get laid tonight, too.’
Hook up – this one’s pretty vague. It might mean you’re meeting up with someone for a drink, but it could also mean you’re planning consensual sex with them. i.e. ‘I’m meeting Jake for a hook up but I don’t know if we’ll actually go all the way.’
Kinky – when something involving sex is a little unusual i.e. ‘Alex covered me in chocolate last night and licked it off – how kinky are they!’
Netflix & Chill – when you invite someone over, usually someone you’re dating, with the intention of watching a minimum of TV before fooling around. i.e. ‘Want to Netflix and chill tonight? I have the house to myself.’
Quickie – when you don’t have time for a long, sensual love-making session with your partner and choose a faster, fun option. i.e. ‘Time for a quickie before we get ready to go out tonight?’
Root – The act of having sexual intercourse.
Threesome – when someone is invited into the sexual relationship of two other people and all three consent to having sex together. i.e. ‘Should we invite Riley over for a threesome?’
There are countless new ways to address someone in the world of sex and dating, and when you’re in a relationship it can be fun to incorporate them into your communications. Whether you’re in a relationship or not, just remember it’s always better to boost someone’s confidence with your sex-talk than use it to bring someone down. After all, everyone has the potential to be someone’s bae!